First thing first...

First things first, Barbara's  surgery went well, Mark said Doctors were very pleased how good it went, Mark said prayers answered. Thank you for praying...
Second, has my mind being going crazy lately, I have been in deep thought on life in general. Life is short, I believe shorter than we even realize. I know I worry about dumb things that really have no baring on life in the big scheme of things. I am becoming such a Peter than I don't know what to do about it. I know the Bible says that in end times people will become a lover of themselves. But on my goodness I think I am going to throw up my insides if I have to see anymore or hear anymore about how pitiful we here in American. So and so offended me, so & so hurt my feelings, I think that my opinion is more important that yours,  children can't play kick Ball anymore, sports should only be for fun, we all should be accepting of diversity, and if your not you are a bigot. Why then when they are not accepting of my beliefs are they not called a bigot? I see  more pictures of people on Facebook with such vulgarity and they claim to be Christians. Why do we think we are so important?   I told the Sunday school class the other day, I have come to realize that in 100 years, who is going to remember me? When you think about it, this can be so humbling... I want to love the Lord with all I have and I struggle with myself everyday and my evil thoughts against people. I know that in the big scheme of things my only goal while I am here is to love the Lord my God with all my heart, soul, mind & strength and wouldn't you know this is one of the hardest things to do when you are dealing with your own self....  I sit here and think about how spoiled and alienated I am from the world as a whole.Those poor people in the Philippines  have lost everything, The human trafficking around the world that goes on,  the Sudan and all the killing and I hear someone (Sometimes me) that it took a restaurant 25 minutes to get me my meal. Shame on me..  We fuss (Sometimes me) how hot or cold church was on Sunday, as we sit in a beautiful building in padded seats. We fuss (Sometimes me) when someone hasn't acknowledge me and we have a pity party as missionaries around the world are hardly ever acknowledged and those d--- Kardashians and Miley Cyrus are acknowledged at least 30 times a day on TV. I believe that this is a time in my life where I am really beginning to understand the "want and need" for Christ return.  I am getting that are you looking for me (Christ) that the Bible talks about. Sorry for my rants but thanks for listening