After looking at the Beth Moore Esther video this week, I can say that I am a mean girl sometimes. If you come after my family, it kicks in like a raging lion. I have never thought of myself as a mean girl, one who needs alot of attention, goes after people for no reason, goes after other ladies men and that life is and needs to be about me. But in listening to the video, I do have some mean girls traits, I believe we all do, whether we will admit it or not. I realize that when this comes up that I need to identify the threat that puts me in this mental state. I came to understand myself better yesterday as I was praying about a situation that still after a year pops into my head. I was talking it through with the Lord, asking myself these questions of why I want to be a mean girl. I came to realize that I didn't get my say in the truth of the matter and this seems to always be important to me. I don't know why I feel the need to say what you said is wrong, and I am right and you have treated me badly. They probably haven't thought that much about what they have done and probably haven't cared. So why does it bother me so much. Satan....... he wants to rob me of my peace, joy, and communication with the Almighty.
So yesterday as I prayed, I still haven't been able to pray for this person to be blessed, but I am praying God will help me to feel that way someday.
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